Vanessa Carlisle, PhD (they/them) is an author, coach, and educator dedicated to liberatory practice through the intersections of sexuality, safety building, and death care.
With twenty-five years experience in sex work and fifteen years of direct service for queer and sex-working people, I have seen up close how sexuality is an integral part of both individual and community wellbeing. As a survivor of both intimate partner and institutional violence, I now craft programs that combat stigma and empower my communities, including trauma-informed self-defense training, somatic coaching, and end-of-life care services. My commitment is to creative community practice grounded in body-based wisdoms and shame-free connection.
Along with many essays and articles, I wrote the award-winning novel Take Me with You about a queer sex worker who must face her grief to build the life she wants. With Dr. Stephanie Covington, I co-authored Awaken Your Sexuality: A Guide to Intimacy and Connection After Addiction and Trauma and its companion workbook, forthcoming fall 2025. Author Elizabeth Gilbert calls Awaken Your Sexuality “a treasured resource.”
End of Life Care
Explore offerings like companionship in the dying process, ritual and legacy projects, practical assistance with care and organization, and education about death, dying and grief.
Sexuality & Relationships
Sexuality and intimacy are integral parts of what it means to be whole and well. Explore coaching options, Vanessa’s writing, and other resources.
Self Defense
Check out workshops designed to empower students with disabilities, sex workers, queer people, women and anyone who is regularly targeted for unwanted aggression.
Books
Substack and Instagram
